Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Why I Do It

A really good friend of mine asked me jokingly this week when I was going to stop posting nearly naked pictures of myself up on the internets.  I laughed and said maybe when I am all healed up.... but maybe never. 

Naw.  The nearly naked pictures will stop.  Eventually.

So why have I done it?  Why am I continuing to do it?

New Years Eve.  Start of a new year tomorrow.  You making any resolutions?  I do.  Every year.  But I am goal setter by nature and I need structure in my life.  I have come to terms with my personality type and I work best with goals.  Oh... and nice lists written with a black pen.  Must be black.

So, are you making a goal to becoming healthier?  Stronger?  Eat better?  Lose weight?

I made that same resolution year after year for as long as I can remember.  But I needed a tool... an intervention of sorts.  So 26 months ago I changed my life and had gastric sleeve surgery.  A tool to help me with my eating addiction.  If you are a long time follower of this blog you have seen it all.  From the pictures of my stomach being cut out, to my losing a heck of a lot of weight, to my most recent skin surgery.

The best part of sharing it all?  The comments.  I cannot tell you how many people have written me through here, or sent me messages on facebook, or stopped me in person and thanked me for my honesty in sharing the entire process I have gone through.  I have had a lot of ups and downs.  Eating addiction is serious.  Just as serious as a drug or alcohol addiction.  When people thank me and say I have helped them on their own path to becoming healthy, it encourages me to keep on the right path too.  A number of people who have followed me on here on the blog or know me in person have pursued weight loss surgery after finding strength in seeing someone they know go through with it and find success.  Others have gone about becoming healthy using other methods of eating changes and exercise.  I am honoured that I have been able to help people to become healthier.

I never want to go back to what I was.  Yes, I was still me and I was a good person, a happy person, a loving person.  But I had an early expiry date.  An expiry date that probably wouldn't have let me see my grandchildren for long.  Heck, maybe not even see grandchildren.  I was 320lbs when I was 32 years old.  And my weight just kept going up.  Easily 10lbs a year.  My boys needed me and I needed my life and my family.

So I will keep on blogging weekly throughout the healing of this recent surgery.  Even with nearly naked photos with silly hearts covering my girly bits.

To those of you making the resolution to become healthy in the new year?  Go ahead.  Make the resolution.  But find a way to help you follow through.  Reach out for help.  Write down your plans and maybe not act on them right away until you have a real plan in place.  Find a support group.  Talk to your doctor.  Talk to a mental health worker if you think you may have an eating addiction.  You can get healthy this year.  You can be successful in this change in your life.  Want it.  Work towards it.  And surgery is not an easy way out if you are thinking that.  Hardest couple of years of my life.  It is just a tool.  Look into the tool if you think it might be helpful in your life.

Make the resolution.  There is always room for change in your life.  And having a bit of extra room in your pants feels pretty good too.   :)

Baby Hunter and I making banana bread.  2008

New born Cavan! 2009

Pushing Hunter on the streets of Kugluktuk! 2007

Just when we were a family of three! 2008

Hunter and I on the other member of our family- Betty the Quad.  2011

Camping with Hunter and reading our favorite book. 2009

Today.  Last day of 2013.  Expiry Date?  Hopefully a long fucking time away.


Anonymous said...

Your very last comment put a smile on my face. Happy New Year my friend!

-N- said...

Looking forward to watching the process continue in 2014! You are looking so good, and I'm glad you wore your New Year's dress, even if it was just for the camera this time.

Sarah L said...

Aw, this post left me a little teary. You have done amazing things, and you will continue to do so for a "long fucking time"!!!

Nita said...

...for all the right reasons. Happy New Year, Kara!

jozien said...

this is so beautiful!