Oh my. The skin.

I have nearly lost 130 in the last 21 months.  The weight loss has been in one hell of a stall for the last seven months, but I am happy to know that I am able to maintain a weight for such a long period.

But the skin.  I was shocked when I looked at photos from last weekend when I was in my swim suit and jumping off the dock.  My house doesn't have a full length mirror in it, so I don't have the opportunity to really see what my body looks like other than photos.  I loved every minute of jumping off the dock with my kids and friends, but when I saw what my body looked liked, I felt embarrassed.  Not embarrassed enough to keep me from doing it again right now or to hide the pictures, but enough that the guilt I feel over the amount of money we are spending on my skin removal surgery diminished quite a bit.

Silly, right?  I should feel proud at what I have accomplished.  But instead I feel embarrassed at the flopping skin.  When I see it, I wonder how the hell I was ever running or playing squash with it flopping and flapping around.  I feel like the saggy-baggy elephant.

My surgery is in just three months and I cannot wait!  I hope the surgeon is able to take care of a lot of the loose flopping skin and I can feel more comfortable with my new, smaller body.

Skin in the upwards and outwards motion...  Not so pretty!