Wednesday, June 5, 2013

All Of My Flaws

I found a new song tonight that really resonated with me and this journey I have been on.  It has been no secret that I have really been struggling over the last couple of weeks and it has been hard not only on me, but on my husband and close friends.  And to anyone who hasn't noticed, don't worry.  It wasn't you not seeing it; I am just a top-notch faker of happiness.  Top-notch.

Losing all of this weight has been hard, but dealing with the emotional baggage has been so much harder.  I have ignored dealing with most of it, almost feeling like it would just go away along with the fat.  Sadly, totally not how it works.  I feel like I am carrying 125lbs around on my shoulders now.

Apologies have been made to friends.  Self-help books have been dusted off.  Husband deserves a medal for dealing with me.  Life moves on and so do I.  Here's to better days and throwing that emotional baggage out the window one carry on at a time.

Still Me:
Still me.


Nancy said...

You're beautiful in both photos! How is your weight loss progressing with the foot fracture, has it slowed down during this time that you have been forced to slow down?

Anonymous said...

I'm exactly there too. I'm not looking forward to the millions of dollars in councelling coming up. Either that or I can spend it on a revision. :-(


Matt, Kara, Hunter and Cavan said...

Nancy, my weight is just sitting right around 195lbs, even with doing no physical activity while broken. I guess that is a good thing!

I would like to be around 180 before my skin surgery though, so I am looking forward to increasing my activity level soon.

Anonymous said...

You are beautiful. Inside and out.

Nita said...

You are beautiful (((hugs)))

jozien said...

aye aye : the work is never done :)

J Dowell-Irvine said...

Hope you are feeling better Kara, funny how life is.... we always have stuff going on and often when people look at our outsides they don't see how we are really feeling on the inside. I never would have realized you were feeling this way and I am glad you let us all know. I don't label my life in good and bad terms anymore. We never know what's around the bend (like your broken foot) it dashes our plans and pisses us off and that's the way life is. - sometimes. I think you are handling it just fine... not easy... not perfect... the just best way you can.