Summer sucks ass. Veggies? Naw. How about hot dogs and marshmallows over the fire. Walks? Not in the +25 weather we had a lot of this summer and the hellish bugs. Sun to keep me energized? How about the sun to cook me so fast I have to hide in my basement.
I got off track. Really off track. Since March I have been losing the same 5lbs over and over again. I am mad at myself for wasting all of this time. The only thing that has kept me from going off the deep end has been Tina.
Tina, another awesome blogger who used to live in the NWT, is trying to lose some weight as well. We started a blog together to encourage each other. A goal was set of each of us losing 50lbs by Feb. 1st. What is on the line? A trip to Edmonton, thanks to my awesome husband, to finally meet Tina after years of talking online. Once a week we check in on this blog and share how we are doing. Without that this summer I know I would have done a whole hell of a lot worse.
I haven't talked much on my weight loss on the blog this summer probably because I have been hiding from everyone!! So time to come clean and tell everyone how lazy I have been. And I need the encouragement everyone was so generous with over the winter and spring. I feel odd asking for encouragement, but honestly it really helps me. And if that is what it takes, then I will ask for it.
Today was my check in day with Tina and I am going to share what I wrote on our blog here today too:
Last week I was doing great and then it all went to hell. Snacking went overboard, meal sizes were ridiculous, and then I got my period. Just call me camel this week. I weighed myself and it says 286.8. Fuck.
I am mad. Mad at myself for not staying on track. I did it for months last winter and my weight dropped easily. People keep saying oh don’t worry, you are just at a plateau, but I know better. I am being lazy. I am not planning my meals ahead of time, I am not using my scale to measure my food, I am not keeping track of my calories, I am not walking every day.
So how do I get out of this funk? Same as I did last winter when I made up my mind to change my life. I write it all down. I make my charts, I keep track of calories, I plan my meals, and now I think of Tina kicking my ass if I don’t hit my 50lbs and meet her in Edmonton.
This morning I ate my breakfast and after I write this I will put it all into my food planner online. I made Matt take the truck to work so I will have to walk to playgroup, even if it does rain which looks probable. I am going to print off my goal chart and put it on the fridge. I am going to make Matt take his granola bars to work so I don’t snack on them. I am going to make my lunch before I leave the house this morning so I am not rushed when I come back after playgroup. I am going to plan my supper and take whatever it is I need out of the freezer. I am going to put my kitchen scale on the counter to remind myself to use it.
I am going to do it all.
:)
14 comments:
Omg you got a new diet buddy, I've been replaced! WAAAAAH~! :P
You can do it! We'll be your personal cheering section. KA-RA! KA-RA! KA-RA!
Losing the same 5lbs over and over is better than falling behind 10 or 15 which is the easy when you get lazy. You're still doing great, take the small victory of not having gained alot and start again.
YOU CAN DO IT!!!
I am about to post the other blog and I think I'll do the same as you. WE CAN DO IT!!
Wow, that is one accurate scale with the .8! I don't have one, but my parents have one and it just rounds for you I guess LOL! I used one at the gym this one time and I was very surprised that it had a .5 after the weight too. Haha. I don't think the . really matters all that much. I just round either up or down depending if it's above 5 or not.
Well, GOOD LUCK! Ya, I don't know how easy it would be with all the bugs... (And then in winter up in Yukon, I'd die...lol). Hmmm, would it be more fun and/or do you have the time for social workouts, like a dance class, or a martial art, or something like that?
Good luck!!!
Hi Kara,
Thanks for you comment on my blog! It's nice you stopped in.
I did have weight loss surgery Nov. 18, 2009. I was 320 and am now 184. I don't regret it at all. It is not easy even though that's what I had hoped for. I paid for my surgery with Dr. Christou in Montreal. If you are considering it, I would definitely do your research. It is a great tool, but it is not for everyone. I would be happy to talk with you if you have any questions.
As for your blog... It's gorgeous! I love the pictures you posted of the scenery. What a beautiful place.
As for your weight loss efforts, I agree with Morena. Maintaining is very much harder than loosing. So if you have maintained a 40lb loss - that is amazing! I know it's not where you want to be and the struggle continues moment by moment. But be gentle with yourself. It's hard work!!
Blessings to you.
kb
I'm also joining in cheering you on. But first i want to say, when i came onto your blog today, i really enjoyed your family picture on top, and i tought: now see, she lost weight! You look so beautiful woman! I wish, i wish, you could just be that, big and beautiful! but here i am my skinny bones, it's to easy for me to say that.
Add my cheers and encouragement to the list of fans. You were my inspiration in the winter when I was struggling to lose weight. Good for you for only playing with 5 pounds over and over this summer. I put back on the whole 15 pounds. You proved last fall/winter that you can do it and you have set your sights again on it. I think you should stop beating yourself up. Summer in the North is short and you enjoyed it. Think of the great memories of time with friends and family. Now...get walking! I know you can do it.
Kara,
I agree with Morena and Jozien. You're maintaining, which is just as difficult as losing. And you look gorgeous to boot!
People who don't have to worry about their weight don't have to spend lots of time planning, counting, and worrying about everything they eat and do. I always find that when I'm on plan, it takes a lot of effort, time, and organization. That's the hard part.
Remember what I said about the stairs in an e-mail to you. In this case, you didn't fall down, you're just at a landing. EVEN BETTER!
Plus, your honey loves you as you are! What better could you ask for?
Something that once happened to me in Toronto while waiting at a bus stand in the morning to go to work: a car went by and some guy was hanging out the window and yelled, "Big, beautiful woman!" Although I was embarrassed, I'll never forget it. I weighed about 265 lbs at the time.
Now I'm passing it on: "Big, beautiful woman!" (Though I'm not some guy hanging out a car window! lol)
Thinking of you!
Carole
I just wanted to say how inspiring you are to me - there's a reason that I stalked you before coming up here ^_^ Even when I gripe at you and Matt for losing the weight I've put on since I came here, I am always cheering for you!
Keep up the effort Kara. You obviously have the motivation so go for it. I had hoped to mention Lisa's weight loss on our blog but she wasn't comfortable with the idea. She's dropped something like 50lbs since January. Of course then I went I got her preggers now and screwed that up a little bit!
Yay you! We wouldn't have 'up' without 'down'. You can do it, as you already know, cuz you already have!
5 lbs is just a little reminder to you to keep focused, you are doing great!
And, besides, you look FANTASTIC in you photos!!
Thinking of you Girl!!
Can I be on your cheering team too? My mom struggled with her weight all her life so I understand a bit of what you are going through. I know you can do it though. Reading today's entry it sounds like you are back on track and doing everything right.
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